Dr. Seuss New Compilation
Illustration: Dr. Seuss Enterprises, L.P. 2011
Nobody owns childhood quite like Dr. Seuss. For more than 70 years, his 44 books have colonized young minds with chaotic tales, strange creatures, moral messages, and nonsensical rhymes. Now his dominion is about to expand, thanks to The Bippolo Seed and Other Lost Stories, a compilation of tales culled from his little-known work previously published in magazines. Not surprisingly, they’re filled with tongue-twisting lessons for kids of all ages.
- “The Bippolo Seed”
Plot: A duck blows his chance at growing a wish-granting tree when he gets carried away.
Takeaway: Keep it simple, stupid.
Good for: Bloatware developers.
- “The Rabbit, the Bear, and the Zinniga-Zanniga”
Plot: A rabbit distracts a hungry bear by preying on his raving hypochondria.
Takeaway: Even the largest beast can be undone by a small and wily opponent.
Good for: Corporate antihacking teams.
- “Gustav, The Goldfish”
Plot: A boy overfeeds his goldfish, which quickly outgrows every container in the house.
Takeaway: Give your pets only as much as they need.
Good for: Valuation-inflating angel investors.
- “The Great Henry McBride”
Plot: A boy fantasizes about the many jobs he’ll have when he grows up.
Takeaway: You are a disappointment to your childhood self.
Good for: Everyone.